Taking the High Road During Divorce Isn't Always Easy
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By Monique Honaman, Contributor - July 14, 2015 - Updated December 02, 2016

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Taking the high road during divorce is somewhat stressful, occasionally bumpy… and always the right thing to do!

I had someone ask me recently, “What exactly does it mean to take the high road?” Interesting question … one that is simple, yet simultaneously difficult, to define.

Taking the high road isn’t always easy.

I wrote a book called, “The High Road Has Less Traffic: honest advice on the path through love and divorce.” As depicted on the book cover, there’s a slight incline to the high road. It can be a good cardio workout! You’re not always coasting on the high road.  And, to the surprise of many people, the high road can be bumpy and full of potholes to navigate and avoid.  Nobody ever said making some tough choices, doing the right thing, and taking the high road was going to be easy. That’s why the high road often has less traffic.

My book deals with taking the high road in the midst of the divorce epidemic and the behaviors associated with ending the vows and bonds of marriage.  I am thrilled to be contributing to DivorcedMoms.com on taking the high road through divorce (and marriage, and parenting, and relationships).  As you can see, this concept of taking the high road has such greater applicability.

Imagine if our students took the high road when dealing with bullying in the classroom or cheating on tests.
Imagine if our children took the high road and negated any peer pressure related to drug and alcohol abuse.
Imagine if our friends took the high road and steered clear of senseless gossip and the drive to ‘keep up with the Joneses.’

Imagine if our employers took the high road when making corporate decisions that impact stock prices, shareholder values and perceived greed that follows.

Imagine if our politicians took the high road and never found themselves on the front pages of our newspapers because of bribery, fraud, and inappropriate use of power!

The applications of taking the high road are endless. It’s a concept that applies across every boundary – gender, age, race, nationality, and profession.  Taking the high road is a goal for which to strive. The benefits are too numerous to quantify.
The high road is ultimately a way of life.

It means making the elevated decisions. It’s opting to do something that may not always be the easiest choice but is always the more thoughtful choice. It’s making decisions that will make your kids, your family, and your friends proud.

It’s living your life so that you can look yourself in the mirror every day knowing that you aspire to greater ideas and ideals!

The reality is no one is perfect. We all make mistakes. We all make decisions we wish could change. We all say things we wish we could take back. Striving for the high road is not an impossible feat. It’s not a ‘holier than thou’ attitude or approach to life.  Taking the high road simply means that you try, with all good intentions, to make the right decisions, and when you, or others, fail to do that, you sincerely apologize, forgive, and try harder next time. 

Yes, “the high road has less traffic” - and “a much better view!” (but that’s the title of my second book .. stay tuned!). I look forward to engaging in a dialogue with you through DivorcedMoms.com.   We are here to inspire, encourage and support one another through all the ups and down of divorce and being a single mom! 

Where do you need a different perspective? What’s your high road compass?

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