I've been reeling and knocked off center from hostile emails from Stanley.
Even though I knew his empty threats were nonsense and he can't just throw me out and move in, it still is hard to see that shit in writing. I spent a few days crying and sick to my stomach, then I talked to my attorney who laughed when I told him what was going on. So, I sent dude an email and told him that I would be happy to sit and have a rational conversation with him about things that we can do to save money and even talk long term about the house and selling, but that if he was going to be hostile and threatening to me he had better have 100K for an attorney.
In addition, he was going to need a Proctologist on call to pick
bits of my size 7 shoe out of his ass with tweezers.
(I didn't say that really).
I think I don't like his girlfriend. Because I can tell you now he didn't come up with this stuff on his own. There was lots of talk about my lifestyle. Like, "I am no longer going to pay for your lifestyle. You can find another man to support you or put on your big girl panties and finally step up and do it on your own."
The attorney advised me to remind him that when we got married me and my big girl panties had a 3 br house full of furniture with 40K in equity and a paid for new car. He moved in with me from a broke down apartment in a scary neighborhood with one box of crap. His clothes were also in the box. His lifestyle improved by about 200% on the day we got married. In addition, I made more money than he did for a few years and have worked FT since. I reminded him of that in my email where I took my power back and became a Warrior Goddess.
All of those times that he got up and went to work and left me at home with the kids
was called Maternity Leave.
My lifestyle? I contributed always to OUR lifestyle.
We had one joint account for 12 years.
"Big girl panties" is not something Stanley came up with on his own.
I don't understand at all where this is coming from. I do know he is financially strapped but he will always be financially strapped. It is how he lives. My theory is that when she saw our pretty house during his week when I was away vs. his small apartment (plus she lives with her parents I think) she got ideas of moving me out and her moving in and adopting my lifestyle.
I'm going to need to sacrifice another shoe.
So, at some point this week we are going to meet face to face and have a rational conversation.
I am going to wear my red lipstick and look as scary as possible.
I may go like this.
I'll keep you posted.