And I have already had to threaten murder and everyone is on lock down, grounded. I had a total
Come to Jesus Family Meeting with the little terrors on Saturday.
and it did improve morale a bit.
Then we went to big Target for groceries and I wouldn’t even walk near the toy aisle. They knew I meant business and there was crying and gnashing of teeth.
One looked like this
And one looked like this
but I held firm and ignored and am the Queen of the House.
From now on I shall be treated thusly
The truth of the matter is I am way to nice to them.
It all started when I noticed the crap in the backyard on the ground. For real it looked like trashy people live here. And I can’t deal with that.
I found a toothbrush back there in the grass.
And empty yogurt cups and popsicle wrappers
And then I found that they had been pulling the green stuff off of my kimberly fern that I planted a few weeks ago. The fern is practically bald headed.
That went too far.
They got that shit from Stanley’s side of the family.
I was ever so glad for him to come in and take over last night.
I left and didn’t move a muscle to even wiggle I was so tired of bad kids.
I watched Mad Men and Game of Thrones and something on Discovery Health about the Female Orgasm. It was narrated by Maggie Gyllenhaal. I kept wondering how much they paid her to keep a straight face and not make jokes about running straight home to her husband to tell him what he needed to do.
I learned all about it y’all. |
Party on Maggie!
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