Let’s face it ladies…we are full-time moms with very little time for an active social life. Ok…make that ANY kind of social life. And when we do get a weekend to ourselves, we do one of 3 things…we either get some sort of beautification done to ourselves such as manis, pedis, facials, or highlights; we go shopping because shopping WITHOUT kids is actually fun; or, we stay in our pajamas all weekend long eating peanut butter out of the jar while watching an entire season of Gossip Girl on Netflix in under two days. (Please tell me that I’m not the only one that does this.)
So, since we all have smart phones and smart pads and smart pods…why not try finding a date or someone to hang out with on one of those online dating sites? You know…the site that has that really cute commercial on TV that shows a cute married couple that met on their site?
Here are my REAL tips for trying your luck at online dating.
- Commercials lie. They lie to sell their products which, in the market of online dating, means you pay $19.99 per month to be able to email someone. Don’t pay it. There are many sites which let you communicate for free and I don’t feel right about having to pay money to talk to someone. It’s weird and I’m not desperate…yet. Try plenty of fish and ok cupid.
- Creepers. There are some serious creepers out there. You know who I’m talking about…the guys that look at your profile 984 times in 10 minutes and then proceed to send you a message that says nothing except “hey beautiful”. Unless they are gorgeous, with a beard and tattoos…block them. Genuinely interested guys will not start a conversation with “hey beautiful”. It’s nice to hear that, but respectful men will start out with small talk and will ask you questions to get to know you better.
- Kid questions. If a guy seems more interested in knowing more about your kids instead of you, block and delete…immediately. I protect my children at all costs and you should too. Do not post any pics of you with your children on a dating site. Ever.
- Forms. When you are filling out the questionnaires online for a dating site, be specific. If you don’t want more children, then pick that. The more specific you can be, the better luck you will have at being matched up with someone you might like. It does lower the numbers of your search results, but why would you even want to look at profiles of men who didn’t have your same interests? Don’t waste your time or theirs.
- Profile Pictures. This is a big one. There are only two types of profile pictures out there. WIN and FAIL. Please, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, have a friend or someone you trust look at your pictures before you put them online, because once they have been seen by the opposite sex…they cannot be unseen.
- The Profile. Your profile is basically a webpage where you are selling yourself to find a guy that thinks you are interesting. Talk about yourself as the queen that you are…not the peanut butter eating Netflix zombie that you are on the weekends. So, talk yourself up and be honest about yourself, your likes, and your dislikes. Keep it positive and upbeat. Men are attracted to confident women who take care of themselves. So be that.
- Getting to Know Someone Online. Ask questions. How else are you supposed to get to know someone?! Ask them about their family (leave it general at first), their job, and what activities they like to do on their time off. If they ask you about porn or sending nude selfies, block and delete. And don’t ever feel pressured to answer questions that you don’t want to answer and remember to take things slow.
- The Number Exchange. Do not, and I repeat DO NOT, give anyone your cell phone number that you are not comfortable with. Been there, done that, got a cock shot before I could even say hi. Blocked and deleted. Just because they sound good online, doesn’t mean that they are. There are some good ones out there, just be sure you are communicating with one prior to the number exchange.
- The First Date. I cannot stress this enough…meet in a public, very well-lit place. Don’t let him pick you up at your house and don’t meet him at his place. Agree to meet at a specified time at a public place. I think the best way to meet someone would be to meet during the day at a coffee house and just have a casual talk. Don’t meet at a bar at 10pm. Not classy.
- Keep Your Options Open. One date does not mean that this is THE ONE. Don’t start looking at wedding dresses and don’t delete your online dating profile. Take your time and remember that one date doesn’t mean you are in a relationship. It was a date. That’s it.
Relationships take time to develop so don’t rush things. It’s not a race. And remember that no matter what happens, you are a beautiful person and you will find love again. So smile, be happy, and have fun!