We Have a Choice Every Day To Make It Great And Productive
Divorce brings transitions and transitions can be uncomfortable and difficult. The life you knew is gone and you may be unsure of what the future will bring. Really all you can be sure about is today and that is the key to happiness: living in the present.
The present moment is always tolerable. Fear sets in when we live in the past or worry about the future. Fear is based in the head and happiness is based in the heart. For maximum happiness, we need to shift inward. I try to do these four things on a daily basis. Some days it may be more of a struggle, but, I know, if I try, I can always turn that corner.
We have a choice every day to make it a great, productive day filled with joy and happiness or a day filled with hatred, dread, and sadness. We are meant to thrive and lead beautiful lives, even if, because of your divorce your life is not the same.
1. Practice Mindfulness – Mindfulness is living in the present moment. I know, easier said than done and really that is the key. It is simple, but, difficult to maintain. Mindfulness can take many forms: meditation, deep breathing exercises, prayer, listening to music, inspirational reading, a silent walk in nature, or journaling. It is whatever helps you go inward and calm the mind. The most effective for me is to start my day with a meditation. It centers me, calms my fears, and gets me ready to tackle whatever comes my way. Studies have shown that even five minutes of meditation brings tremendous results.
2. Affirmations – Affirmations are positive statements that are written in the present tense. Our minds are constantly busy with thoughts, many of them negative. Do any of these sound familiar? “I can’t do this.” “It is hard to meet a nice man.” “I can’t afford that.” Affirmations, when read on a consistent basis will help change those thoughts. To write your affirmations, think of something you would like to improve in your life. Begin the sentence with, “I am_________________.” Some examples are: “I am healthy.” “I am creating my happiness.” “I am lovable.” Now write them on index cards or post-it notes and read them out loud, at least, three times a day. Change your thoughts and you can change your life.
3. Gratitude – Being grateful for all the blessings you already have in your life will bring more blessings. A grateful mind is centered on the best, and therefore, it expects the best and will receive the best. I keep a Gratitude Journal and every night before I go to sleep, I will write down three things that I am grateful for that day. Usually, I try not to repeat the obvious blessings, like my sons, my home, or my work. I try to think about the not so obvious blessings. The interesting conversation I had with a person at the grocery store or the incredible, beautiful cloud arrangement I saw on my morning walk. Try starting your day with this statement, “I am grateful for this day, miracles shall follow miracles.”
4. Exercise – Since my divorce, there have been many trying times and many days where it was difficult to get out of bed. But, I would put one foot in front of the other and force myself to at least go for a walk. Exercising was not an option; it was a necessity. Besides all the great health benefits, it relieves stress and can help calm your mind. I find I sleep much better when I exercise. You do not have to train for a marathon, just find something that fits your lifestyle and your daily schedule.
Start today to create a life filled with happiness!
More from DivorcedMoms.
- Thanks for the Divorce!? How Gratitude Can Help You Heal
- Meditation: Becoming Mindful of Your Own Life
- Living for the Future: Why We Must Let Go of the Past
For information on divorce in your state, visit Divorce Magazine.