Being a mother is without question the hardest job any woman blessed to have children will ever undertake. There is nothing in your life that can adequately prepare you for the role. True, there are tons of parenting books and classes out there that claim to give you the tools you need to do the job or improve the job you’re doing. The reality is once your bundle of joy arrives you realize almost immediately how ill-prepared you truly are for the job.
As time passes and the children grow up, the CEO of the house, Mom, begins to realize the children’s lives dominate hers. Her position in the home feels important yet diminished and she finds herself becoming overwhelmed. When these emotions creep in and mom begins to take charge of her life, she’s viewed and criticized as a “bad mom” by those who are often overwhelmed themselves and don’t know how to break the cycle. If you want to become a “Bad Mom” and, ultimately an AWESOME person, it’s time to seek change.
These 5 healing methods are necessary for your own health, sanity and personal well being.
1. Learn to say “NO”! – This is not easy for any mom who is fully engaged in the lives of her children. But if you don’t learn to say “No” you allow yourself to over commit and take on more than your schedule or your level of interest allows. This sets you up for great anxiety, resentment, and even guilt. Making yourself unavailable to do certain things is OK! Mastering this skill will enable you to ask other questions regarding your life, the universe and the role you play in it.
2. Find YOUR Purpose for Living – As important as your role is, being a mom wasn’t the only reason why you were placed on this earth. We were all born with heavenly gifts that are unique to each of us. Do you know what yours is? Have you taken the time to find out?
You owe it to yourself and the universe to not only determine it, but to share it. Your true gift(s) will emerge once you’ve found your passion. It will get you through the rocky periods in your life, e.g., divorce, death, “empty nest syndrome.” Living your purpose will bring greater depth and meaning to your life. If you want to heal yourself, you must first find yourself.
3. Find your inner peace: Spend time ALONE – The white noise and static of life rings louder and becomes increasingly more magnified when you begin to manage the intricate lives of others, move through your career, etc. When you’ve learned to say “No”, you’ll quiet the noise and tune into your purpose. In order to grow, you must remain STILL. In order to hear (God speaking to you), you must be quiet. Too many women are uncomfortable in their own company. Spending time alone is uncomfortable for them. Learn to enjoy your own company and find yourself!
4. Do something YOU enjoy – When was the last time you invested quality time in yourself and did something you really enjoy? Do you have a passion for writing, photography, scrapbooking, cooking, etc.? Whatever it may be it’s time to explore it or spend more time doing it. Make the investment in YOU and your interests. That’s not selfishness; it’s rejuvenating your thirsting spirit so that you can be an even better mom, wife, friend, daughter, sister, co-worker, boss – a better YOU.
5. Reconnect with the pillars of YOUR Life: Mind, Body, and Spirit –When life’s challenges seek to rattle the three primary pillars of your life – mind, body, and spirit – it’s imperative that you reconnect with them in order to bring BALANCE back into your life. Clear the clutter in your mind. Take a walk, workout, eat well and minimize those liquid “spirits.” Get your body healthy again. Make time to be STILL and find your inner PEACE so that your spirit may breathe new life into you once more.
Any mom who embraces the importance of living a more balanced life so that she may be a better person to those in her life is in reality, not a “Bad Mom”, but an AWESOME (and healthy) MOM!