It is a blow to lose friendships that you thought would last forever. Some close ones may have initially been your girlfriends and then you went out as couples with spouses. To have these pals align with your former spouse is a surprise. Look at it this way: divorce lets you know who your true friends are.
Below are 7 Ways To Fill These Vacant Positions?
1. MeetUp.com is global and has many groups for varied interests. I am in the local girlfriend’s one, ages 40s to 60s. We go to restaurants for lunch or tea, happy hour, lattes, or whatever. These women are well-travelled, intelligent, and a lot of laughs. My divorced buddy is in the hiking group. Some larger cities have divorced and single parent groups in MeetUp.com.
2. Join special interest groups to encounter like-minded people. You may develop a friendship which deepens into love and then marriage, which has happened to a few divorced people that I know. These groups may be political, civic, for a particular cause such as animal rescue, or in many other areas. Some churches have singles’ groups, which do a lot of fun activities. I joined an international organization, Toastmasters, which has the added bonus of enhancing your career and boosting personal confidence.
3. Ask your friends to invite their friends to gatherings, and you do the same. Meet for Happy Hour, get together at someone’s house or at a concert. This is a way to get to know others who may have similar interests since you have friends in common.
4. Your workplace may have a potential pool of new friends. See if co-workers would like to go out to lunch or, out after work. You may work in the tech industry where there isn’t a lot of getting together after work. But the sales team, for example, may be very social and have plenty of get-togethers that you could attend. This scenario happened at my large university hospital. My unit did things after work most evenings, and the other departments would call our secretary to find out where we were going. Or people stopped by to firm up after work plans and they were from all over the hospital. This could be an option in the business world too.
5. I have heard from dog owners that they have made friends at parks or when out walking their dogs. Some neighborhoods have block parties or events, which is another method of meeting new people. Our neighbourhood association used to have a big pot-luck Christmas party at a nearby community room, which is where I made some acquaintances.
6. Go to festivals, especially ethnic ones where people sit at community tables. I sometimes go solo to our local Greek Festival and have met some great people. An orthodox church has several international lunches where people sit at large tables and interact with each other. We have an Oktoberfest and other fun events that encourages camaraderie. There are arts festivals, music ones, food themed ones and so forth across the country where you can chat to other folks.
7. Join committees at your children’s school. You work as a team with other parents, and this is one way I made friends after divorce. You sometimes meet over coffee to discuss the school auction or some other fundraiser in a casual setting. You already have similar interests, kids and school, so the ice is already broken. I met a close friend that I’ve known for 20 years at our children’s martial arts classes. Meet other parents through your children’s activities.
Having a friendly, open demeanor lets people know that you are willing to mingle. Look at your body language to make sure that you are not giving off signals that you do not intend. Crossing your arms can seem aggressive and too much eye contact can be unnerving. Looking at everything else but the person you are conversing with can be misconstrued as a lack of interest. Consider reuniting with old classmates and deepening your friendships with childhood friends. Your social circle will widen by following these tips.
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