Am I Type A? Somewhat. Maybe. I’ll admit that I’m organized, have been known to make a list or two, but deep down inside I view life as one big Relaxation…with purpose.
Makes perfect sense, right? Yeah, you should try living it from my point of view.
If you’ve ever been typed under the Myers-Briggs system, you may be familiar with the term ISTP. It stands for Introverted Thinking Sensing and Perceiving. Everyday translation? Ready to try anything once.
I am in possession of a write-up that was done many years ago for the workplace. I love reading it. It speaks to me when I need to step back and reassess my life, my efforts, and my direction. I especially enjoy the following paragraphs describing ISTPs from Type Talk by Otto Kroeger and Janet M. Thuesen:
ISTPs’ nature is to be quietly observing, collecting data on all things at all times. They do not think of themselves as watching in order to do something with the information; they are merely scanning the universe because it is part of their nature to want to take in all that is occurring. The often dramatic outcome, however, is that when an emergency occurs, they can move swiftly to the core of the problem and correct it. What seems like instinctive action is actually the result of long periods of observation that enabled the ISTP to be aware of all the details of the picture.
When not involved in an enterprise of adventure of the kind that compels all their attention, ISTPs relax…As a result, life is one long relaxation to the ISTP, frequently interrupted by various exciting hands-on challenges to repair, understand, improve, or experience whatever comes along.
Why am I sharing this somewhat dry and technical explanation about my personality? Because I’m in the information gathering stage right now and anticipate making a big life decision in 9 months. No, not a new baby. Oh no! Rather, the beginning of my new life stage.
You see, I have a dream for the future.
And, after reading several books on goals and attending a series of goal-setting classes, I realize that having dreams come true relies heavily on one thing—taking steps to make those dreams a reality.
One of my life dreams is to be married. It may sound a bit antiquated in our Woman Power World of individuality and striving for equal treatment. But I know what I like.
I’ve seen the studies that trumpet the benefits of being married (or in a serious long term relationship):
- Living longer
- Beating cancer
- Having a steady sexual partner
- Financial stability
- Combined expenses
- Knowing someone has your back
- Overall lifestyle improvement
- Sounding board for new ideas
- Having someone who at least tries to understands you
Don’t believe me? Just google it. So many mind-blowing reasons to be in a relationship.
And I’ve done the living alone thing. I’ve had about a decade of living by myself, getting my own way, and doing what I want when I want. So I know of what I speak. While I do enjoy getting my own way, getting my own way ALL THE TIME is rather boring. I really like what a second person brings into my life: shared experiences, a second opinion, a bit of constructive criticism, and a whole host of differing points of view. In a word, variety.
See above for my love of information gathering. I’m a lifelong learner and I embrace that part of me.
I want to get my relationship status settled so I can move on to the really fun stuff, like exploring the state/country/world with my favorite travel buddy, the person I’m married to. And I want to get down to the business of learning what the other person is interest in, whether it’s tobogganing, wood carving, wine tasting, or making really tiny ships inside of glass bottles. I won’t need to be actively involved in those types of pursuits, but I would enjoy having a conversational knowledge about my significant other’s interests.
And if he just happens to be into gardening, photography, cooking, and travel, then I’ll thank my lucky stars that I hit the mother lode. I want to have a person I can turn to at the beginning of the day and say things like, “Let’s go for a drive” and spend the day exploring back roads to little diners and scenic views. Or a week on a cruise ship looking at whales. Or a month driving around the country and hitting all of the hot spots.
For my future I’ll keep one thing in mind. I have a goal. If the man in my life doesn’t see himself as being my partner, that’s ok. I have options.
I’m not in this for a drive by. I’m in this for the long haul.