Before the Wild West Adventure I offered to answer questions from the crucial to the mundane and tonight I answer them. The timing is perfect as I am one tuckered out being. Late nights writing, early mornings saying, Rise and Shine!, and loads of important tasks to do have left me in dire need of a bona fide 8 hours of sleep, not the 6 or so I have been getting lately. So I will divulge and depart for my bed with dreams of happy kittens dancing in my head.
From D: What do you miss about your marriage?
Nothing substantive, D. It ran its course and at the end gave me the gift of a fresh start with no baggage and no guilt. If The Genius had handled things differently I might answer differently, but his betrayal has only left me feeling grateful that I am no longer his wife.
From S: What would you take to a deserted island?
First, I would like to admit that I am one of those people who would refer to the ‘deserted island’ as the ‘desert island’. As in Mojave. Sometimes I am rather dense. Now, to the question… I would take my laptop, coffee, chocolate, wine and wi-fi. My hope is that the island would provide fruit, fish and a power source. I would also love to have the fine company of someone who makes me feel fulfilled even if the amenities are sparse. Someone who makes me laugh, and love and naturally shine bright.
From A: What is the best gift HGM has bestowed upon you?
There are so many. Pick one? Okay. But it’s a plural. The kittens. All you beautiful, magical souls that take time from your busy lives to check in on me and offer your wisdom, support, humor and love. I don’t feel alone, and I hope that everyone who comes here who is dealing with life’s challenges feels the same way.
From C: If you could change something about yourself what would it be?
My lack of organization, my detest of paperwork and my inclination to procrastinate over things I detest, like paperwork. Oh, and my boobs.
Wait, did you say one?
From L: Dream date?
A couple hours sweating in nature, a beach-side grilled dinner with the perfect pairing of wines, a walk at sunset, and then laying in the dunes on a sleeping bag watching the stars pop out, one by one, and letting the conversation flow.
Now, if you meant a person – well, my dream date would be someone who wants to be with me for me, all of me. Someone who is engaged in life, exploring themselves, nurturing themselves and open to nurturing another. Someone who is firmly on their path, and doesn’t become upended when they go astray. Someone who is filled with enthusiasm and passion for life, values it as the gift it is, and chooses optimism over pessimism. I don’t do woe is me very well, which should not come as a surprise.
From N: Have you ever gone back to the beginning and reread HGM?
While I have looked up a post now and then to refer to it as I’m writing, I’ve never gone back and reread the entire blog. That may be something I decide to do on the anniversary of my first post.
From R: What’s your guilty pleasure?
Daydreaming. I’m not sure that it’s a good use of my time. Pondering and daydreaming are two separate activities for me. Pondering is with purpose. Daydreaming is a lazy float on a river that’s moving every which way. I don’t really get anywhere. Nothing much is accomplished. When I daydream I pop out of it and continue on with my day. When I ponder I come to realizations. I’m hoping the pondering I’ve recently done will lead to some realizations that will help me manifest this next leg in my journey. I don’t have a second to waste.
From M: What are you most proud of and least proud of since the Pocket Call?
I am most proud of my strength, my inner fierceness that came when I most needed it so that I could limit the boys exposure to the muck that The Genius’ affair dumped on my doorstep. I had every right to come unglued. I refused. I believe that’s all the Universe needed to see to know that I was ready to realize my dreams. Lo and behold, HGM was born.
I am least proud of my initial desire to remain married to The Genius in spite of his affair. Of course, that desire vaporized when I found out he had been lying to me grandly for four years. But to even want to stay after being told it was a one year affair did not serve me. That said, I don’t judge anyone who stays in a marriage after being betrayed. Every situation is different. I had dealt with quite enough disrespectful nonsense from him that the affair should have been the death of it. Ultimately it was.
From L: What is your greatest desire?
To avoid the healthcare system at all costs by remaining fit and healthy until I die of old age in my sleep. And I wish the same for my children.
From V: How do you want this to…end…for lack of a better word?
What a tricky question! I don’t want HGM to ever end. Not until the night when I lay my head down for the last time. But if you mean, How do I want my life to play out? Well, m’lady, that is the question I will answer in Friday’s post: Manifest Destiny. As I applaud Act One, I’m ready to speak from the heart that which I need in Act Two. I feel moments away from being clear enough to state it with sincerity and know it is what I need and not what I want. I take this step seriously because when we speak our needs from a place of total clarity they are met. I need to be certain that what I seek is what I need, and that I am centered enough to accept the outcome without judgement.
And the hardest question of all:
From A: What is your favorite food?
I’ve sat here for 10 minutes typing and erasing and typing and erasing. I’m going with oysters. With Asian pears coming in a close second. White truffle oil honey is right up there, too. Keep in mind, much of the available options aren’t available to me as I am allergic to gluten. If I wasn’t, I might say pizza from Brooklyn, or fresh baked sourdough bread with grass-fed butter, or crepes with scrambled eggs and maple syrup (some of you might gag with that one but, oh…oh…), or baklava.
I’m actually pretty psyched I’m allergic to gluten because my diet has been cleaned out. By and large I eat a simple fare of foods in their most whole state. Fresh, unadulterated and natural.
But back to the oysters. I like them raw, and cold, nestled in their shells, buoyed by salt water and bursting with the memories of a life lived in a bay. And I like them BBQ’d with a glaze of The Sauce. My most loved and cherished BBQ sauce on the planet. I’ve eaten it on popcorn, chocolate ice cream, and randomly straight from the bottle. It’s sublime. I’d eat it on dirt. As a matter of fact, add The Sauce to the list of things I’d bring to the deserted island. When BBQ’d, oysters warm the soul. A perfect reward for a long hike at Limantour. My favorite place to get them? The Farmhouse in Olema. I bow to them for what they do with charcoal and oysters. And oysters are so perfect for sharing.
Round One of questions answered. Thank you for taking the time to be curious. I’m off to bed. My mom will be so happy to know it’s before midnight. These next few days require a rested heart and mind working in tandem to shed the last remnants of muck and begin the rewarding process of creation and manifestation.
I am grateful. And excited. And ready for the opportunities that wait on the other side of the street.