Al came on Thursday after nearly a month apart. It was awesome. We had a plan to have date night on Friday night to discuss wedding plans since we were kind of at a crossroads with that.
I picked him up at the airport at 10:20 on Thursday morning.
There were hugs, then tongues, then outright groping in the car.
It’s been a month, people.
Plus, he’s hot.
The kids were at school, the nest was empty, the dog can’t talk, so we ran in and stripped.
It was awesome.
He told me after that I bit him.
On the face.
Apparently, I was crazed. I’m a crazy, old, lady. Who bites….
We did carpool, played nice with the kids, I went to a reading meeting at the elementary school, and then we met Al’s son (who is in college an hour and a half from me) and his girlfriend for dinner with my kids. It was really fun and the girlfriend is a little doll. Seriously, she is this tiny little thing who called Al, “Sir” and told me “Yes, Ma’am,” several times. They think we are so old and uncool. But the best thing in the whole world happened after dinner. Standing in the parking lot of the restaurant, the 19 year-old son, who hasn’t been super easy to crack,
He opened his arms to me and I ran in to them like
I almost knocked him down.
It was a fine, fine moment.
Then I took the kids back to the nest and dropped them with Stanley who had come in for nest duty. He had asked me to do them for dinner because he had a, ahem, beer club meeting.
When we got there at 9:20 p.m. he was drinking black coffee. I was married to the man for 14 years and never saw him drink coffee before bed unless we were in a restaurant and it was decaf. Personally, I think beer club meeting was a little wet and hoppy and he was trying to sober up. Whatever, I didn’t care. I was high on the hug.
On Friday, Al ran around with me and even sat in the car during a work meeting. Sigh. He was sending me dirty texts throughout. It was awesome. I love to be turned on while discussing psychiatric meds and behavioral interventions for non-compliant schizophrenics.
After carpool we hung out with the kids until Stanley came to take over with the kids for the night. Now that was an interesting story. So, Stanley comes in on his crutches, and tells us that he is taking the kids to the Humane Society to pick out a new kitten for he and the Cat Lady’s apartment. I’m like, “Oh, that will be fun,” and Al is nodding politely, when Cat lady comes through the door. I introduce her to Al, and there we were; the 4 of us staring at each other and the kids looking at all the adults like,
“What fresh hell is this?”
This is mean, but when we left Al was like,
“That is not a very attractive woman.” After a margarita he was all, “Dat is one ugly woman.”
Then we went for our Margarita Wedding Discussion Summit.
We have been at a stall with the wedding planning. I am hesitant to plan an ‘event’ because of money, the tacky factor, etc. We made lists and notes over margaritas. Tasteful wedding with party vs. ceremony in a living room.
Money is tight, we have 6 kids between us and they cost money.
We are both divorced and don’t want to look ridiculous (that is mine).
I’m fat and don’t have a thing to wear (also mine).
Al says that we have worked hard for this and deserve a party.
Al says that people want to celebrate with us.
Al says that this has been 32 years in the making, and by damn, he wants a wedding.
So. Wedding it is.
I am going to confirm the date this week, June 13, 2015, and reserve the Soul Museum.
We are hoping to keep the guest list small.
We will be doing it as cheap as possible.
We will be saying our “I do’s” in front of Isaac Hayes pimped out car…
After that we went and saw Gone Girl (GOOD) and then had lots more sex.
(Don’t be a hater.)
The Groomzilla left on the 5 p.m. plane. It was horrible to see him walk away.
In 8 months, we are hoping to be done with this stupid long distance relationship.
Now, what am I going to wear???