Last night was Golden Globes night!
Pretty clothes and hair!
Except it was boring.
I was bored with the fashion even.
There were mullet dresses, the high-low ones, I don’t hate them but I still call them mullet dresses.
Lena Dunham, for once, did not look like my Aunt Mae’s drapes but still,
bless her heart.
The rest were boring boring.
So, I kept flipping it to Downton Abbey.
Which was disturbing and depressing.
So basically, I missed most of 2 shows with my flipping.
Then, I saw Emma Thompson throw her shoes.
They hurt. She said the red on them was her blood.
But they were still fabulous.
Then, I started thinking OMG, I bet those beautiful women have ugly feet!
Then I started looking online at pics of their feet (I told you I was bored). I looked for hours.
I was mesmerized by the horror.
Because guess what?
THEIR FEET ARE HORRIBLY MANGLED FROM HIGH HEELS.
If you don’t believe it, look at the bunions on these gorgeous women:
Another of Posh because it ithey are so, so bad
Christina Hendricks who I love. LOOK AT HER FEET.
Help me Jesus to understand.
This is wrong, wrong, wrong.
I love pretty shoes as much as the next woman, but this is bad, bad.
The feet must be saved. We need to start a campaign. Bono needs to write a song to free our feet from this terrorism. Our toes are prisoners of war. They are saying,
“Father Bono, help us, help us!”
Why do we do it to ourselves?