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Subject: Dividing Stuff From Marriage

May 17, 2015
by Cuckoo Mamma

Lots going on here in the nest.

 

 ms piggy.gif

 

The house now belongs to Al and I.  Stanley paid his amount in this month for ‘rent’ since he isn’t moving into his house until 5/26. There are boxes everywhere.  It kind of surprises me that he is packing at all.  

Generally our moves went like this:  He packed his computers and I packed everything else.

Apparently, per the kids, he closes on 5/21, paints next weekend and then moves on 5/26.  Also per Merlot,  his girlfriend isn’t ‘buying the house with Daddy’, because he said, “if they ‘break up’, he never wants to have to go through this again”.  

I think if I was her I’d be packing my shit to put in my own house, but that’s just me.  I mean, that would hurt my feelings y’all.

 

oh honey.gif 

 

 

He still hasn’t signed the form where we negotiated our 60/40 deal and child support.  I have no idea what he is thinking, as usual.  I’ll ask him this week.  He got his 10K check for his house equity, he didn’t pay for the pool, I paid it out of his house ‘rent’ which means, I really paid it.  All of this to say, I’m sick of him and he needs to take his beer shit and go. I sat next to him at Merlot’s music program on Thursday morning at the school and my eye twitched the whole time.

 

eye twitch.gif

 

 After the performance, Merlot cried sick and needed to come home.  

Y’all remember this from 10 days ago?

 

Whoever has the kids when they are sick takes them to the Dr.  If the kids are sick during school hours, it will be the responsibility of the parent that has them to pick them up. I have taken plenty of days off to sit home with them this past year and taken them to Drs and Dentist apointments.  If they have regular Dr appointments, I will expect you to let me know when and I will take them if they are with me at that time. Again, this is a normal part of divorce. 

 

Well, it was his day and he looked right at me…

 

sock monkey.jpg 

 

and said, “Can you take her?  I need to work.”

 

 crossed-eyes.jpg

 

 Srsly, you can’t make this shit up.

(BTW, I told him no.)

Then, later that day, I found this in my inbox.

 

From:  Stanley

To: Cuckoo Momma

Subject: Dividing Stuff From Marriage

So the next thing for us to decide is what I’ll take with me on moving out, and what you’ll keep.  I’m presenting this as a first draft for negotiation/discussion.  We can go over this tonight if you like, or take some time to think about it.  I do have to pack soon though! 

Obviously, anything acquired during the marriage should be split 50/50.  But I’m OK with you having the majority of big ticket items like the furniture etc.   

I’ve tried not to include stuff you already had – your bed, kids beds etc.  Things that were gifts from your parents I have put on your side.  Your bed, the big entertainment center and some other things I know you had before the marriage, so you keep.

 

Stuff I take

Stuff you keep

 

 

Wedgewood China (as it came from England)

 

Gold rimmed glasses from wedding

Stand Mixer

Various silver platters etc from wedding

Wedding Silverware (was from my Mum specially)

Denby crockery, white pasta bowls

Beer Fridge (in garage)

Cups, glasses, regular silverware etc

Chest Freezer (in garage)

Pots and pans, other kitchen stuff

All of my Beer Stuff

Washer and Dryer

Computer

Kitchen Fridge, stove

Tools and yard equipment (e.g. weed whacker, ladder, table saw)

TVs in kids’ rooms; main TV in family room; TV in your bedroom; TV sound system in your room; DVD players etc

My clothes

Family room couches, ottoman

Dresser in my room (I had before marriage)

Sitting room couches (reupholstered)

 

Patio and pool Furniture

 

Dining Room table, chairs

 

Rugs

 

Buffet (from Kevin and Teresa)

 

Hutch in dining room

 

Baker’s racks

 

Corner computer hutch (the one in my room)

 

Your clothes

 

 

Stuff I purchased after divorce

 

Futon (Boy is OK with me moving this)

 

Lawnmower

 

My bed, mattress, duvet

 

My closet organizer

 

Weight set

 

TV in my room

 

 I can dismantle my fermentation chamber in the garage, or leave it as a work bench.  I do want the A/C unit from it though.  Thoughts?

 

Why yes, I have some thoughts.  Thanks for letting me keep my clothes.  

Haha.  It was fine, I got all the big things (only because he didn’t want the worn out stuff and so much was mine prior to marriage).  I expected him to take the family room furniture and patio table at the very least.    So, I was actually fine with it.  And yes, please take the fermentation chambah and your beer shit, Sparky.

Almost done.

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About the Author

This custody arrangement is somewhat new and I recognize can only be used in special circumstances. I know there are many instances in which it won’t work. For example, if your ex is immature, jerkish, a liar, bat shit crazy or just all around such a dumb ass that they must be avoided for your own sanity, then forget about it!

Find me on Twitter

Comments

  1. Liv BySurpriseLiv BySurprise says

    May 17, 2015 at 5:46 pm

    Yay!  Almost done!  

    Reply

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