Yep, that is me. That is my life these past few days. I was in such a funk yesterday I couldn’t even blog. You didn’t want to know what was inside my head. It was a baaaaaad place.
I felt like this inside my head
But first and foremost!
SWAMP ASS HAS HAD HER BABY!
But my guess is that it had nothing to do with her legs up in any sort of birthing position since little Maxwell Drew Johnson weighed in at 9lbs and 13 ounces. Somewhere, in some swanky hospital, Jessica is on some heavy duty pain meds. At least I hope so. That is one big baby.
Just the thought is making my pelvic floor ache.
I am also having sympathy nipple pain and urinary incontinence.
Congratulations to Jess. I hope she is back in her
practical shoes lickety split.
I have been completely wrapped up in nonsense. I haven’t felt great but since I had 3 kids with Strep last week that isn’t a shock. Then there has been PTA stuff going on and I have been busy with that nonsense. Plus, The Boy’s baseball season is ending and I can’t fucking wait. I have exhausted just about every topic with the other moms sitting in our foldup nylon chairs. To tell the truth I had a good case of swamp ass myself out there in the hot sun on Saturday.
In addition, I think that Stanley’s information has caused me slight panic. I’m glad he is moving on with his life, I really am. It does however make me feel a little sad that I am in a holding pattern. You know; holding babies, holding shit together.
More than anything I am hoping she has a big yard where he can move his beer shit. I will be more than happy for that to be relocated from the nest. I will even arrange the movers.I told my mom Stanley’s big news today and her response, after the initial “maybe he will get that trashy beer stuff out of here”, was about how quickly men move on with a little bit of “didn’t you know this would happen?” thrown in.
As if I’ve lost some big prize. Stanley is NOT the lottery.
He is a beer monkey with a PhD and a curly pig tail.
who doesn’t talk, has taken up smoking again and likes to tear stuff up and dig holes he has no intention of filling. Apparently we have to wait for the yard to ‘settle’ before he can fill the holes in the front yard.
So see? Not the man lottery Mom.
Then I got a lecture about how we didn’t know each other long enough.True words.