Being single used to mean you were never going to be married. You were considered to be an "spinster." In today's society being single, at least to me, means freedom, breathing space and permission to be me.
If you have never seen the movie, How to Be Single I recommend it highly. It is a romantic comedy that shows the reality of being single and break ups. Rebel Wilson for me is the key friend everyone needs. That one friend who is raw honesty, embarrassing in public, yet the one you can be sure will help you achieve a one night stand and be able to laugh about it.
Here are 5 quotes from How to Be Single I am certain you will be able to relate to as an independent single woman.
1. "There are a lot of people in this world who need things like you in their lives to feel complete. I am not one of them. I am fine without you."
If that is not powerful in and of itself. I have been single for four years and after crying my eyes out for over a year over my ex who chose to cheat, I now sit back and think why the hell did I waste so much time and energy on him? I felt I needed him to be me but I really don't. I am happier, less stressed and free to do whatever I want without guilt.
2. "Isn't there a danger that you'll get so good at being single, so set in your ways, that you'll miss out on the chance to be with somebody great?"
I have been thinking about this a lot lately. Have I become so set in my ways or put up boundaries that no human being can meet? Maybe I have yet I am not willing to allow anything to change that. I allowed that in my last relationship and look where that is, he is with another woman. I feel if that one person who is right for me is out there, I will know.
3. "Marriage! The end of spontaneous sex, traveling by yourself and buying whatever you want without having to ask permission. Right?"
Right! I rushed home from work to come home to what? A miserable negative life sucking husband who never wanted to go anywhere or do anything. Most of the time I was not even allowed to speak because he always had a bad day. I would need someone to push me off a cliff to ever want to go back to that! I travel and visit friends, I go out without the text, "when are you coming home." I am a guilt free shopper, if I want it, I buy it, it's my damn money!
4. "The minute you walk out of here you're gonna realize how much shit I do for you and how great I am and how much you need me, and you're going to start stalking me."
Wow, what a concept we have all lived and said. I know I thought that. He would realize how much he missed me and all I had done and he would come crawling back. Ok, snap, back to reality. Not happening.
Who gives a shit what all you did. Does that matter now anyhow? He is with someone else. All that you did can be locked away with the letters, pictures and your old wedding ring he gave to you. Right where it belongs! If he comes crawling back to me I will kick him in the teeth and tell him to crawl back under the rock he has been living under. Ever heard the saying, "men want what they can't have?" Think about that one.
5. "This is the first, tiny green sprout of life fighting its way out of the gravel parking lot of your heart."
Once you're over your grieving process and thinking no one will be at your funeral because he was your lifeline, you will see there is a life away from him. This new life called singlehood is a blessing for you. It gives you a chance to find out who you are, what you want in life, and to laugh again.
Don't rush right back into a relationship. Take the time you need to enjoy who you are alone. You will see that tiny green sprout of life blossom into a beautiful bouquet of flowers and your heart will learn to love and trust again. It will also help you with family, children, and friends to grow closer and allow them more into your heart.
See the movie if you have not had a chance yet. Watching the development of the different characters who evolve into people they never thought they would, will help you to realize anything is possible down the path called life. You will relate to each one in the process of what you are going through. Rebel Wilson will have you laughing to tears which are what everyone needs.