Change Your Style... Change Your Life? Updating Your Single Style

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By D. A. Wolf, Featured DM Blogger - January 20, 2014

A significant life change - positive or negative - just may call for updates in other areas. For example, are you starting a new job? New clothes! The kids are finally in school all day? I'll say it again - revisit the wardrobe! 

Certainly, a marital status change will spark a desire to perk up your personal style. That may include a fashion update - and maybe more.

Woman Shopping for New Style.pngLifestyle Updates on the Menu?

  • If you're free to take up the reins of reinvention with a change of scene, you may want to consider a relocation as part of the process of starting over.
  • As you dive into the dating pool after years out of circulation, you may want a flirtier or more sophisticated style.
  • If you're taking on new professional responsibilities - or you simply want to try something new - why not express yourself through a closet full of new clothes, or a few classic and versatile pieces?
  • Maybe you've lost a significant amount of weight, intentionally, or via the "Divorce Diet."

When you're feeling more comfortable in your skin, when you're embarking on an entirely new stage, when you're taking more control of your own life - it's the perfect time to boost your confidence with a style evolution - or revolution!

The Divorce Diet and Style Options

Some of us lose weight when we're stressed, and divorce is one of the most stressful life events you'll ever go through. The process of dropping those pounds may leave you in need of a new wardrobe - but naturally, budget may be a concern.

If you have lost significant weight, you may not be entirely comfortable in your new skin just yet. If you want to stick your baby toe in the waters of a new look, consider starting small - and informing yourself about styles and colors that may suit the evolving new you.

One way to get started?

Look at the colors you live with. Do they suit you? Do they make you feel good?

Measuring Inches Lost.pngWe often dress our interiors in ways that we would ideally like to dress ourselves. Perhaps you enjoy bold colors (and they show in throw pillows or the bright accent chair). Maybe you have a romantic edge in the floral pattern of your upholstery and the draping of your window treatments.

If you find yourself in a new body after skinnying down, take a cue from your immediate surroundings and reflect - are you classic, Bohemian chic, minimalist, romantic?

Do you love pastels and neutrals, solids or geometrics, a variety of patterns?

What's Your Style? Tips on Trying and Buying

A few tips on trying a new style?

  • Make sure you know the basics of proportions, fit, colors and so on. There are many resources on the web to assist.
  • Look through magazines (online and print). See what you like. Think outside the box!
  • Consider your "target market"- if you're going to date or you're in a new job. What works for flirting is not the same as the office.
  • If you shop online, poke around for reviews on quality, delivery, and customer service.
  • Go shopping with a friend whose opinion you trust, and who understands your budget.
  • Start small if you like - with the mini-makeover (makeup, hair, a day at the spa).
  • Don't take a friend who will be jealous of your newly slimmed figure, or for that matter, your freedom.
  • Don't be afraid to try something playful. Black and white geometrics with a touch of hot pink, dark leggings or skinny jeans with sexy booties. Enjoy this process.
  • And remember - pretty, properly fitted lingerie!

If you bring an "unusual" color or style selection home, think about it for a few days. Leave those tags on! Don't chicken out (if it's a departure), but by taking a little time, department store mirrors (and impulsiveness) won't distort your impression.

Fotolia_52876450_XS.jpgDon't expect your friends, your family, or your children to be entirely accepting of your new look. It isn't that they don't want the best for you, but they were comfortable - as were you? - with the way you used to look. Change, even positive change, can be difficult on those around us as well as on us. 

My Life Event Fashion Tales

When I lived in France (for school and work), I tended to dress in a classic, simple looks - pencil skirts, fitted tops, black tights or stockings and a medium (but pretty) heel. I went for a single signature accessory - and I consider scarves to be a staple.

I kept to a few pieces that I could mix and match. I kept them in neutrals - black, charcoal, taupe - spiced up with a dash of occasional color. 

Incidentally, skirts and tops are incredibly versatile when it comes to work or socializing. The mix-and-match approach is also easy on the budget, especially when you're dealing in classics.

In my corporate life before and during marriage, my style became somewhat more "business casual." Dashing between conference rooms and preschool pickup, from fingerpainting with kids to a late meeting - I wanted washable, practical, wearable clothes - but without looking frumpy.

After divorce?

Life changed entirely. My children were still in elementary school, but I dropped four dress sizes very quickly - and I was also in need of "dating attire." It took a few years before I began my post-marital dating adventures, but when I did - I updated my style with brighter colors, flirtier looks, and higher heels. The boost in my spirits was huge! 

My clothes were sexier, I invested in fine lingerie, and I dared to bare... even though I was over 40. It's all in the confidence, yet leaving a little to the imagination...

The shoes? I admit, I was already exceptionally skilled in that arena.  

Make Healthy Habits Part of Your New Lifestyle!

On a final note, perhaps the most important reminder of all. Looking fabulous is great, but feeling good is what's really essential. That means maintaining your health - physical, emotional, and spiritual.

So nourish your body properly - with the right food, sleep, and exercise. Feed your mind - by staying open, curious, and finding laughter wherever you can. Fill your heart - with your passions, friends, family, and love.

Whatever major change you're dealing with - happy, confusing, anxiety-provoking, exciting or perhaps a mix of all of these - make sure you're taking care of your health. Work to kick any bad health habits, and do enjoy every moment of your style reinvention.  

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