Getting stuck in an emotional hole is something everyone experiences. No one can truly avoid it, yet we can all escape and overcome it.
You know those days. It may be beautifully sunny outside, the birds are chirping, and all seems fair and right in the world and yet, you just cannot be happy about anything. While the sun may be dancing in the crystal blue skies you can’t see it due to the gray storm clouds overshadowing you. You just feel as though the world should kiss off for the day! You don’t want anything to do with anyone. You just want to be alone and yet, you don’t want to be alone. Those crummy feelings seem to have no enemy. Or do they?
It is easy to stay in that shallow grave of pity and sadness because it doesn’t require you to do much but sit. At the same time, it doesn’t feel good. It feels pretty isolated, cold and dark. It is the perfect spot to beat ourselves up without anyone knowing, which allows us to stabilize our position in the emotional hole.
Often times we rely on others to pull us out of the hovel if we let them close enough to us. Sometimes, we resist their pull in an effort to pull them in with us because, as the saying goes, “misery loves company”.
No one really wants to be in an emotional hellhole but we all fall into it at some point. Doesn’t mean we are clinically depressed. It means we have some learning and growing to do within ourselves.
If you really want to dig out of that emotional hole here are 4 steps that might make your climb a little easier
I know what you are thinking – “Boo!” Or “I already do!” Yeah, well, this isn’t about losing the weight; it’s about changing your mood. See, the brain is chock full of all kinds of chemicals, like endorphins, that are shaken up and rushed throughout your brain and body when you get up and move. The problem with exercising is we often participate because we have a desire to lose weight yet we don’t normally like the program or the routines. The trick to using exercise to improve your mood is to choose something you enjoy doing!
If you don’t like to huff and puff or sweat don’t pick something that encourages that response. Find something that enables you to feel good once the routine is complete. Yoga and similar practices might be a way to go. Just like anything else “there’s an app for that”. With so many choices you are sure to find a workout app that suits your pleasure principle! Once you find the one you enjoy you will look forward to exercising because you KNOW you will feel good mentally afterward! Hell, after enough workouts you might like the way you look, too!
2. Positive music!
So, you know that feeling when you are sad and you want to just sit and listen to sad songs? Do you know why you do that? Because it is easier to wallow in that hole of despair than turning on the Minion’s “Happy” song and looking for a reason to be happy. So often, we misunderstand that we have to have a catalyst to be happy. Realistically, we don’t need any reason to be happy and being happy doesn’t mean we are joyful or excited. Just being at peace can invite happiness in. There are also studies that show how our brains respond to the music we hear. Think about football games and the music that is played throughout the game. It’s not jazz or classical music, is it?
3. Cry it out!
No, seriously, sit down and let those tears flow. There is something cathartic about letting your emotions out in a manner that you can feel, taste and see. Crying is like an emotional reset. It’s a therapeutic release. Crying may not solve your problems but you will be able to think more lucidly if you allow yourself ample time to bawl and scream it out.
Meditation is more than sitting in a funky cross-legged position on the floor while chanting like Monk. It is about sitting and breathing. Not necessarily thinking. Actually, the point of meditation is to learn how clear your mind and do a mental body scan. It’s the chance for you to tune out your world and tune into you. There are numerous ways to meditate and various positions to use while meditating. And guess what? There are several apps for that!
Being down in the dumps is something everyone experiences. No one can truly avoid it, yet we can all escape it or overcome it. There is a difference in being depressed for a little bit and then being clinically depressed. The former is something you can control or rebel against without professional assistance. The latter is a complication requiring support from an expert.
Either way, the negative emotions are valid and deserve to be recognized, explored and overcome. You do the same with all the positive emotions but may not notice it because, well, why question the good feelings, right? Either way, know yourself, forgive yourself for feeling something that doesn’t feel good and use the list above to get yourself out of the emotional hole and on the path to where you can start to feel good!!