What One Nine Year-Old Boy Really Wants From His Divorced Dad

The following is a guest post written by my nine year-old son. From time to time my children ask to write for the blog. I always encourage them (though I clearly reserve my right not to publish their posts simply because they wrote them), my only instructions being that their topic must have something to do with how they feel about their parents’ divorce and its aftermath, and what they write must be from the heart and sincere. I think my son successfully accomplished this. 

I just came home from a long vacation with my father and his fiancée. Vacations come and go. They always feel so short. This December I was taken to fancy restaurants, a movie premier and got a private tour around the county of Los Angeles, plus a tour around Warner Brothers Studios. This seems like a dream but, to my surprise, I did not enjoy all of these luxuries as much as I thought I would.

Disneyland is known for its long lines and awesome rides. Not the kind of thing my father’s fiancée would like. She pretended to be sick. I loved that concept because I would get to spend some alone time with my father. Finally.

The thing that bugged me was how she became so ill all of a sudden. Because the night before, we ate at one of the finest restaurants in Los Angeles. So she definitely didn’t get food poisoning. I had been sick before the vacation, but I felt better before she could get sick from me. So how did she get sick? She didn’t get sick at all. But my father concluded that she got sick from me. That was impossible.

We would be spending two days in Disneyland. One day in Magic Kingdom, one day in California Adventure. Both days, she was sick in bed. The next day, she spent the daytime sick in bed watching television. By dinnertime though, she was all healthy and good. I guess she didn’t want to miss out on Boa, the steakhouse where Robert Downey, Jr. and Jennifer Lopez are a common sight.

If she didn’t want to go to Disneyland, she could’ve just said so. I don’t like the idea of her not being with me if she is just going to fake being sick whenever she is uncomfortable with the daily activity and then be better for the fancy dinner reservations. I would like her better if she could give my dad and I alone time out of the kindness of her heart. Not when she’s pretending to be sick and achieve her goal of not going to Disney.

My father is under her spell. She can convince him to do anything she wants. Anything.

The day before we went to Disneyland, we went to Universal Studios. And she did go. I thought her hobby was to eat like a queen, and skip the part that involves fun. Not this time. She came to Universal, a place where my father has been, enjoyed, and returns to over and over again. There are few rides but quality counts. The Mummy is his favorite ride, and is the one good roller coaster in the park. It is a creepy, fast, scary roller coaster. His favorite. His fiancée? Not so much. But the world would come to an end if she had to stand outside of a ride alone while she waited there for my father, my siblings and me, right? So my father, a man who can make his own choices, was forced NOT to ride The Mummy: The Ride. The thing he came to Universal for. He seemed okay with it though. But I know deep down that he would have preferred to go on the ride.

When my parents were married, my mother used to either stand alone or go on the ride. It was considerate for anyone else who wanted to go on. But my father’s fiancée must have my father all to herself. As Golem would say, “My precious.” (The Lord of the Rings: The The Return of the King)

Have you transitioned a stepparent into your children’s lives?

• Blending A Family: Love, Loss And A New Kitchen Table
• If Mama Was Married
• We Welcome with Love… Our New Step-Monster
• Meet The Children?

photo credit: dualdflipflop via photopin cc