I miss Husband #2 today…Father’s Day. Holidays like Father’s Day aren’t a big deal for Husband #2, but he stepped in to help me parent the kids who were missing Husband #1. It’s a big deal to me.
Sure, being a step-dad is thankless. But luckily Husband #2 never had to hear those hurtful words, “You’re not my real dad.” Either he was hands off enough in his parenting or my kids were brought up with enough sense not to hurt someone with those very mean words. No matter what, it couldn’t have been easy for any man.
I remember when Husband #2 approached Son #1 about proposing to me, way back when. It was one of those old-fashioned things that Husband #2 did. He asked Son #1 if it was OK to ask me to be his wife. I’d like to say all worked out great…but it didn’t. Son #1 was horrified. He was perfectly fine with us all living together, but the marriage thing? No. And even though he loved Husband #2, a tantrum was thrown by an 8-year-old little boy who still had a hope in his heart for his parents to get back together.
To his credit, Husband #2 did things with the kids that I couldn’t do. He ran 5K races with the fast ones, while my shin splints and I walked with the slower crowd. He watched Avatar: The Last Airbender, an animated cartoon I equate to being a pre-teen boy’s martial arts soap opera. He made us piles of the perfect burgers using his secret blend of spices and timing. He added value to our family life.
It wasn’t easy for Husband #2 and I recognize that. So in the spirit of appreciation and thankfulness, I sent Husband #2 a Father’s Day card. Just to tell him he is special.
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