I gave up a career I loved and had worked so hard to achieve to help my husband build his. He wanted children so I went through six In Vitro Fertilization procedures to have 2 children.
After a 24 year verbally abusive marriage my husband left me and our family for someone half his age. That was the moment I began my journey into the upside down rabbit hole of the crazy legal world of a high-conflict divorce. Five years later I am still waiting for our community funds to be divided.
When you are on the receiving end of a high conflict divorce you find yourself constantly playing catchup.
Being caught by surprise, I prepared as well as I could. I knew which attorney he would contact and when I called their office I knew by their response that he had already hired them. Who knows how long ago he had contacted them.
So I hired a respected attorney who had great reviews and was around the same age as my hopefully soon to be ex’s attorney knowing that they had battled on the divorce field many times before.
In the end, my needs and my children’s needs were dismissed as unimportant. My almost ex didn’t want me to have anything at all and fought every attempt at resolving our divorce.
In the last and most important meeting, my own forensic accountant said something that made me feel horrible and I agreed to much less than I should have.
I felt forced to sign the settlement agreement.
My last and greatest insult was as the attorneys and judge left our settlement conference they stopped on their way out, looked at me, laughed and said: “You’ll be fine, you will get married again!” I have never felt so violated and humiliated in my life. To make matters worse I had paid two of these men and my ex doesn’t appreciate anything I sacrificed.
Don’t let this happen to you. Stand up for your rights. #TimesUpNow, #MeToo, #ChangeThisNow
Sara says
High conflict divorce takes 2 parties
carol johnson says
Not when your husband is a narcissist. Not when he calls just to belittle you. I hired an attorney that wasn’t aggressive hoping it go smoother. It wasn’t. I gave up my rights in a state where I should have received alimony for life. I gave away as much as I could and it still wasn’t enough.
Stephanie says
Well said…It’s doesn’t matter what you offer they only want to destroy you…
cjohnson says
Thank you, that is exactly how I felt!
Em says
I’m in same situation. The courts allow the narcissistic abusive men to keep harassing abusing manipulating and not caring one bit about the children they put in middle and torture.
All for their own need to be in control and make my life miserable.. 9 yrs no end in sight.. and divorce and all was completed. Just keeps dragging me through courts. #changeisnow
cjohnson says
I’m so sorry to hear that. It seems they always believe the men no matter what they say.
Liz says
It takes one person, suffering from a Cluster B disorder, to create a high conflict divorce. My attorney just kept asking me, “How did you not respond to this?” after reviewing all of the email correspondence my ex sent to me. In the past eight years my ex has told our son he was going to have me shot and killed, threatened to choke and strangle me in front of the parenting facilitator, been arrested for harassment and recently convicted of his second DWI with a BAC over 1.5. The most unbelievable part, he makes over 300K a year.
I highly recommend the “Our Family Wizard” website to document all communication with PD ex. I have found myself wishing our son was 18 (he is 9) I am tormented by my own thoughts while our son is with him.
carol johnson says
I changed the title, thanks!