Sitting in the middle of my empty ice cream carton pile, (yes, Rocky Road is still my favorite) I began to realize that 1, I couldn’t eat another bite of ice cream if I tried and 2, after such a long marriage I needed to pick myself up, dust myself off and jump back into life again. A new and improved life I thought to myself, after all I wasn’t getting any younger.
I wondered what my first step should be, and I thought about all of the things that I didn’t do during my marriage. I also thought about all of the things that would help me get moved forward into this new single life, no matter how stagnant my dating pool would be!
So here is my checklist, it has helped me and maybe it will give you some ideas on how to start your own rocky road to recovery!
1. Look forward not backward. Looking backward only makes you trip over cracks in the sidewalk or sad memories and you may miss something wonderful right in front of you!
2. Reduce your time spent on Facebook. People are rarely as happy as their social media makes them appear!
3. Start setting aside time to do something you love. Maybe paint, or write or knit, or sing. Whatever it is, find time to do it! Even a few minutes a day is better than nothing!
4. Exercise. It doesn’t have to be every day. It reduces stress and helps you sleep better.
5. Get a manicure. (I didn’t do this during my marriage, I never felt I could devote that little bit of time, but now it makes me feel great!)
6. Donate clothing that reminds you of your ex. If for some reason you feel too attached to it and can’t give it away, then box it for later.
7. Find one thing each day to be happy about. No one has a guarantee for how long we are here on earth, There is beauty all around us, take the time to enjoy it!
8. Keep a “Life List” of things you want to do and make yourself a promise that you will do them.
9. Join a dating site….(ugh) It really wasn’t that bad.
10. Have (protected) sex! Sex makes you feel alive and desirable.
I am working at checking things off my list, I try to live life in the present and I don’t look at Facebook every day.
I exercise more now; I take Zumba classes and I found that I love yoga, it makes me feel strong and I am more flexible than I have ever been! I joined the YMCA so I’m not spending a lot of money either.
I’m clearing out my closet and I feel like a weight has been lifted with every piece I give away.
Sunsets have become my favorite thing to be happy about, each one is different and a lovely end to the day.
I have dipped a toe into the dating pool and have had the best sex of my life, who knew it really does get better!
I have been bad about setting time aside for things I want to do but here I am writing so I guess I am finally working on it. My life list has places I would like to see but haven’t yet, but a girl can dream!
So I hope you will join me on this rocky road we are traveling. We all deserve to be happy!
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