During my last walk on Limantour I snapped these pictures – bouquets thrown by mermaids. I pondered them tonight, not having looked at them since that day. Seagrasses, tangled, woven together by liquid hands.
A pretty tangled mess of life left on the sand by the waves.
I needed a breather this weekend. Time away from thinking about the divorce, or my journey or anger or fear. A conscious choice was made to not write. I was too rigid after deflecting arrows for most of Friday, Saturday was spent centering myself, and Sunday was all about nurturing. Writing about fear would have just been a cover for venting about something else.
I have a deep appreciation for the level of turmoil and heartache that is born from betrayal and divorce. I bow to those who can remain respectful of each other during such trying times. These pictures remind me that although the end of a marriage is complicated, intricate, and confusing, I can remain supple, gentle and grounded. And in the end, there will be beauty.
Someone said something profound to me recently.
So very profound.
Steady yourself, this one is deep.
It will all be okay.
It will all be okay.
It will all be okay.
Love yourself,
Cleo
– The comments in the queue are next – next being tomorrow. Thanks for your patience. Must sleep so I can wake to see the Lyrid meteor shower just before dawn.
Oh Cleo,
Sometimes less really is more. Such simple words, but just what I needed.
Thank you again for sharing your walk, I am strengthened by it.
Don’t forget to love yourself,
Rebecca
R,
…and all that is needed. The simplicity of the post mirrors the need for simplicity in my life.
Thank you for taking the time to comment and for being here. We strengthen each other.
Love yourself,
Cleo
I have been reading for a while. Came to this site for all same reasons as everyone else, unfortunately, and getting the strength to heal and grow, lucky to be walking alongside you. I am not a blogger, but I absolutely had to comment on this one. Imagine my shock when I opened the page this morning and the first thing I saw in the picture was … pubic hair design… How sick and how appropriate.
A,
Now there’s an interpretation! There’s a story in these pictures. Thank you for taking the time to comment and for being here. I’m grateful to have you alongside me.
Love yourself,
Cleo
‘It will all be okay.’ I’m repeating that with you today. Thanks for sharing because we all can’t tell ourselves that enough. Maybe one day I will honestly believe it after all the heartbreak is behind me and I know if my children and I will have to move and how much child support I’ll get and what the custody schedule will look like. I really hate divorce, especially when it’s sprung on you with all the force of a hurting jet.
K,
One day you will believe it, because it can be true, if you believe it.
The limbo, unknowns, and tug of wars of divorce can be scary. It will all be okay and Nothing is as good or as bad as it seems really help. Mantras really help. They help to replace the inner dialogue of fear and doubt. I’m glad you will be chanting it with me. Thank you for being here, K. You are surrounded by support. Stay close…
Love yourself,
Cleo
These pictures (and your interpretation of the tangles of seaweed) are beautiful!
F,
Thank you, F! These are going to be enlarged and hung on my wall. Grateful you took the time to comment.
Love yourself,
Cleo
I think we all have a bit of that pretty tangled mess inside of us, don’t we? Yours is absolutely beautiful, C.
The most soothing and healing words I heard during my own process have been “It’s going to be OK,” said to me by one of my most grounded, loving, and present friends. The simplest message is often the most powerful (spoken like a true editor!
.
xo, Nic
N,
I adore you. Thank you for taking the time to comment. And for your editing prowess. Your goddessness. Your ability to follow my rapid fire speech and get every single word. You are such a gift. Thank you for being here and for being authentically you. And my goodness, do you have a way with words.
Love yourself,
Cleo
The pubic hair interpretation is very interesting. I will tell myself “It will all be OK” today. My betrayal was uncovered almost 9 weeks ago, and I too am in the middle of the divorce mess, wondering about child support, and how to start over again after almost 15 yrs. of marriage. Let’s stay strong together!
S,
We’ll stay strong together and be okay together. And while being okay – which I define as being in a perfect state – we’ll commit to looking for magic, creating our reality and being brave. Because bravery and courage is rewarded with magic. I’ve seen it happen.
I LOVED that interpretation! When I enlarge those pictures I am amazed at the details, the little bubbles, the tumbled purple grasses, the way they are woven together with such symmetry. Really remarkable. We can walk by them and think, Oh, sea grass. Or we can walk by them and need to stop, stoop down and stare in wonder at the complexity and beauty.
Pause for magic, m’lady. Stay close. We’re here for you always.
Love yourself,
Cleo
Oh yes, MyLady – wise words indeed
A dedication for your highness. Blast the volume and dance like no tarantulas are watching
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJd21z7T99g
and then :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU
and finally the last one and my favorite
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKzacHbsBJM
That’s my secret uplifting trio !!! And it works
Hugs from a still cold Montreal
S
S,
I will have to wait to blast it till the dudes are not snug as bugs in their bunk beds. I’m so excited! Thank you for sending the links. I’ll get to know a little more about m’lady in Montreal. Blow a kiss to that beautiful city for me. I hope to be there soon.
Thank you.
Love yourself,
Cleo
I really need to hope and pray it will be okay. It has been 9 months since my D day, she lives in my house and has taken over my life that I had for 42 years. Please keep telling me it will be okay I really needed todays message thank you
L,
I am so grateful you are here, m’lady. Especially today. It already is okay. But that doesn’t mean it’s going to feel that way right now. You are dealing with a very difficult situation. Just as you are thinking, She is in my house, I bet she is thinking, I am in her house. And while you may think she is gloating while saying that, I’m thinking she feels gross. It’s just a strong intuitive feeling. On the outside she may appear to be having the time of her life, but on the inside it feels strange.
Today as I was driving west a thought about TG snuck into my head. I said, I have no time for that. I’ve got a life to live. I only wish to surround myself with positive thoughts. I may have my moments of anger, sadness, exhaustion, but I will not allow negative thoughts or thoughts that bring me to a negative place. Out of all the good habits I’m trying to adopt, that one is now rock solid. I don’t do negative.
So, for the next week, with a smile on your face, say, It will be okay. And shoo off any negative thoughts.
You, L, have your life to live. All the bells and whistles of the Universe are ready, with hands dipped in baskets of confetti, for your arrival. Celebrate you – not to rub it in his face, or show him what you’re made of, or make her wonder why you can so easily move on, but because YOU ARE WORTH CELEBRATING!!!!! I don’t even know you and I’m digging around for my cymbals and tuba!
If you need me you know where I am. Do not hesitate to email me. You will be okay. Now it’s up to you to make the right choices. Choose to be happy. Choose to change your mood if your mood turns up sour. Thank you for letting me know you’re here. Stay close…
Love yourself,
I believe with all my heart that it will be okay for you and for all of us. Thanks as always for sharing this painful journey with us. When things are finally ok will we forget how painful this was, like one can forget the pain of childbirth? In some ways it has been so transformative that I always want it accessible, at least a little bit anyway. But no fear of that right now, I am still in the thick of it. Anyways, I ramble. Looking forward to your next post….
M,
Thank you for being here and for commenting. The pain of childbirth is a natural part of the beauty of giving birth. The pain of betrayal and divorce seems to be nearly as unavoidable as having to give birth once pregnant! But it’s not to be forgotten. Not stewed over or allowed to fester, but never forgotten. There’s nothing natural about being betrayed by those who commit to protect us. It’s unnerving, to say the least.
Keeping it accessible, and honoring the pain and anger that we’ve experienced, is healthy. It helps to keep us on track by remembering wehre we went astray. Your inner knowing is right on target, m’lady. Transformation is often born out of adversity. We’ll morph together!
Love yourself,
Cleo
“If I Were You” by Kasey Chambers. Just listen to it over and over. xo
R,
I will! Thank you!
Love yourself,
Cleo