It is with great sadness that I inform you that we lost Liz Smith Conley on October 3, 2016. Liz shared her love for writing and helping women on this blog, Lizzy Smilez and in the process was a beacon of hope to many, many who needed encouragement and community during a difficult transition in their lives.
Liz was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma at the young age of 44. She fought valiantly and tenaciously to win against cancer. She left us due to complications from pneumonia, complications that would not have occurred if Multiple Myeloma had not depleted her body’s immune system. So, it is with respect for Liz and her determination to live that we lay her loss on the steps of Multiple Myeloma. Pneumonia didn’t take Liz, cancer did. In Liz’s honor we hope that you will become more informed about Multiple Myeloma and her at MyelomaCrowd.Org, a project she helped create and wrote extensively for over the last 4 years.
Liz has been a DivorcedMoms blogger since the day we launched the site in October of 2013. I knew Liz to be a tenacious writer who was dedicated to helping other women survive divorce. She was a voice of hope and an example of the good that can come when a woman takes control of her life and leaves an abusive relationship.
She was also someone I, as her editor, could count on whether what I needed required a pleasant action by her or, caused her stress. Liz showed me over and over again that her writing, her reputation and her commitment to a project were worth doing what needed to be done by her. She was someone who never disappointed. She was a powerhouse of strength, positive attitude and had a lust for living life that awed me. Knowing my days of working with Liz are behind me, breaks my heart. I will miss her tremendously.
The truth is, I didn’t often think of Liz’s cancer because she didn’t make that the main focus of her life. Just a few weeks ago, she shared with me an idea for a blog post she wanted to write. I asked her when she found the time, told her, “the dust doesn’t settle under your feet.” And, that is how she faced what would stop most of us in our tracks. She never let it slow her down and she never let it impact negatively those around her. Liz Smith Conley was the definition of BRAVE. She lived her life BIG and BRAVELY.
Liz and Bill Conley in Argentina June 2016
From Liz:
“And that’s why I’ve learned to live. Live BIG and GRAND as often as I can. As often as my health and treatments allow, and responsibilities to children, self, family and loved ones. I travel like crazy and have discovered locales that bring me great joy. I go hang gliding. I ski. I do things that are outside of my comfort zone. When I feel angry, sad and depressed, I hit up the salon, go for a walk, or play with my friend Katherine’s dog. Anything to get out of that zone and into a different one. I plan to go skydiving soon. Wear your favorite shoes, use your pricey perfume and favorite dishes daily, and break out the handbag you paid way too much for and have been hesitant to use in case you ruin it. Who cares? It’s doing no good in the closet. Go hang out with your friends and laugh. Pity parties are allowed, but letting them go for too long accomplishes absolutely nothing and can be extremely dangerous to our fight to get well, recover, and gain our emotional, spiritual and physical health back.”
There are many things we will miss about Liz. The example of strength she set for those of us who worked with her. Her persistence for doing the work and doing it correctly. Most of all, her gentle nature, her bright and bubbly personality. I had the pleasure of knowing and working with a woman who was as close to perfection as any one person can come. God’s speed Liz, you left one hell of an impression with us here at DivorcedMoms.com.
I leave you with a quote from Martha Chan, owner of DivorcedMoms.com, “In her honor, we have to be who she was, brave, authentic and keep on fighting for what matters.” Let’s make Liz proud of us!
Liz being Liz!
I’ve been reading Lizzy from day one. She was a God send to me when I left my alcoholic husband. I’m not sure I can break the habit of coming here to read her new posts. She was a great habit to have. Thank you, Lizzy for all your help. RIP!
I’m so, so sorry. She sounds like a wonderful woman. My thoughts are with her family and friends.
On no! I’m stunned. Lizzy was kind of enough to respond to an email I sent her asking for advice. She was very comforting to me, during that time. Stupid, stupid cancer! She was good to me, I’ll never forget that.
I saw this on Facebook the other day. I’m going to miss reading her blog. Thank you for the wonderful tribute. My thoughts are with her family.
I’m so sorry!! My best to her children and family. May she Rest in Peace and Love in God’s arms.
This is such tragic news. I could tell from her writing and the way she handled her situation that she was a good woman, and strong too. My deepest sympathies to her family and friends. Such a sad turn of events!
Rest in Peace Lizzy Smilez. Thoughts and prayers for your family.
I’m so, so sorry. Thanks for all the advice Lizzy, you were a great help to me. God’s speed!
I read her articles often and i really enjoyed them. I can honestly say her writing had a positive impact on me. She sounded like a fighter.
Sad day indeed.
I loved her writing and the way she took no prisoners. She told it like it was. I’m sorry to hear she is no longer with us, I’ll miss reading her. And, boy, she was a beautiful woman. Look at the happiness on her face in those photos. Such a shame!
I’m so very sorry to read this and my prayers are with her family – especially her children. I read her blog with much interest. My ex was not an alcoholic/addict, but many of his behaviors were similar and she wrote so honestly about her feelings and gave such practical advice as well. My hope is that her blog will live on in some way to continue to help others!
I was just looking for a way to write to her as I was diagnosed with breast cancer after my divorce and felt she was such an inspiration. The, I came upon this page with the sad news. I am glad she was strong and showed her daughters to live fully. It’s a lesson for us all. RIP
Life is sadly short, but Liz lives on in our hearts through her stories and the way she told them. Her final postings here indicated that she had much left to write, and that sharing with us here remained important to her. We’ll miss you, Lizzy, but we thank you for what you shared.
I will miss her words, but so glad that she left us so many of them. You are free now. Those left behind will miss the hell out of you, but I know that you left enough memories behind for each of your loved ones to draw on through the sadness. Thank you Liz. Rest in Peace. Be at Peace. Prayers for your family.
This is heartbreaking news. My heart goes out to her family and daughters. Rest in the arms of the Lord, Lizzy. Much peace to you!
My heart is breaking, this is so sad. She was a wonderful, loving, kind, good person, and I really had hoped for a good outcome for her cancer. She seemed to have moved on from the bad times and was forging ahead with love in her heart and forgiveness for all the situations she had dealt with. And she could really rock a great outfit. My deepest sympathies to her family and all who loved her.
I am crying as I type this and we never met.
Anne
What a beautiful tribute, Cathy. I’m so sorry for our loss here at DivorcedMoms. She really wrote from her heart and I found comfort in her words. Her spirit will live on here at the site, continuing to help women who need that extra inspiration.
So saddened to hear this news. Her poor daughter’s. Who will protect them from that man they call father. I live with the fear that my twice recurring breast cancer will return and rob me of time with the loves of my life – my daughter’s. They have already lost their father and losing their mom too would devastate them, even though they are 24 & 27. Glad Liz lived her life to the fullest and condolences to her husband.