Whether or not you like her…whether or not you will be voting for her, you can probably remember a time when you were called nasty. Whether it was by your husband or your boss, I can imagine that most women have experienced being called nasty by a man.
For me, it was my Ex-husband, who called me nasty in a settlement conference with our lawyers. As I bit my tongue to fight back tears, I told my side. I told his secrets… I spoke about his lack of parenting and his clawing control over the family finances, despite a lack of need to do so. He stood up and leaned across the table looked into my eyes, and called me nasty. He looked me in the eyes, exerting his usual attempt at control over my emotions and he called me nasty.
I was nasty because I called him to task. I was nasty because I stood up to him. Would he have the nerve to lean across the table if I were his male boss calling him to task for his job performance? Doubtful. There is, and there always has been, a complete double standard about what women need to do in order to get somewhere… jump through a few more hoops, take a few more detours… and still not get to their desired destination. Many men don’t like Hillary Clinton, and in my humble opinion, it is because she is the atypical female. She is that #nastywoman who won’t give up.
She is full of the strength and self confidence that I never had. She was THE #NastyWoman, inspiring me and many others to stand a little taller, and maybe most importantly, finish their words and refuse to be spoken over. I will be heard, can be one of the many lessons here. I am determined to be judged on my value, not my gender. For me, it was motivational and inspirational. I asked my daughter…did you hear that??? Did you hear what he said?? Did you see her hold her ground? Did you see her stand firm?
How many of us wish we had nerve back of steel when fighting for a job, or equal pay, or a fair Court Settlement. How many of us who were stay at home mothers were in the position of having to justify our value, and when we did, were called nasty? I will never forget my own feelings. It was a reductive term that was spewed out to belittle my value and my worth. He wanted to make me afraid to stand up for myself. It almost worked. It was much like we heard last night in the Third Presidential Debate.
Hillary handled it better than I did. I folded and cried. I was not worthy of the #nastywoman title. I have grown up since then. There is no do over. I have grown through life and experiences. I hope other women find that strength in numbers implicit as an opportunity of growth for women as a result of this campaign.
Like the days of Union formation, women are prime to learn that there is power in numbers. The earliest recorded labor strike was in 1768, with workers protesting a wage reduction. Hillary in her white suit, should cause us to remember the Suffragettes who wore white as a symbol of their fight to earn the right to vote.
#NastyWoman a rallying cry for women everywhere. Twitter is full of women declaring themselves nasty. It is the 2016 version of Phat, I guess. Yeah, I’m nasty and phat. Want to make something of it?
Whatever side you are on, it might have become clear, that us #NastyWomen, might make the 19th Amendment the most powerful of all the Amendments.
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