People are really scraping the bottom of the barrel for this 30 Days of Thankfulness thing on FB.
Thank God it is almost over so we can be spared anymore embarrassment.
Personally I’m glad I didn’t start that nonsense since today I’m thankful for Cipro (again).
(Yes! I pee after sex! It just keeps happening to me! I’m starting a new treatment and hopefully it will never happen again and you won’t have to hear about my bladder issues ever again.)
Why are these people hugging? STOP IT! It all starts with smiles and hugging!
I digressed. Back to this thankfulness thing because it is bugging me.
Seriously, one of my ‘friends’ (not really, I hate that bitch) was thankful for teabags, since a good cup of tea cures every ailment. Really? Every ailment? It doesn’t cure cancer. Or broken hearts. Or even UTI’s from too much happy time with the Maintenance Man. Every ailment my ass. She has also been thankful for labradoodles and perfect snowflakes.
I’m thankful for the ‘hide this friend’ option.
I was reading her thankfulness posts out to Al this weekend and going off about how much I can’t stand her and like, how in the hell this person is on my friend list still, and he said he was going to post:
“I’m thankful for inverted nipples so that people can’t tell when I’m cold.”
(he doesn’t have inverted nipples he was just trying to divert my attention by saying, ‘nipple’)
I’m thankful I didn’t have a handgun available and didn’t shoot her ass off in college.
This girl was a very good friend my first year of college. Then I noticed she really wasn’t all that nice to me. She said to me once, and I quote, “it must be really hard to be my best friend since I’m so pretty and everyone agrees you are merely interesting looking”.
I think I got an ‘interesting looking girl’ complex.
Why would anyone say that to anyone else?
in addition, she isn’t pretty.
and she is the vainest person I have ever met. She regularly threw her hairbrush at the mirror after spending hours hogging the bathroom that she shared with 3 other women.
I hate her so bad I want to put her real name and picture on my blog.
But I won’t.
Our parting interaction on graduation day, May something 1986, went like this:
KNOW IT ALL BITCH: I’m going to miss you! I’ll keep in touch and we can be in each other’s weddings and stuff.
INTERESTING LOOKING GIRL (ME): Actually, let me put it like this. I’m sick of you. I don’t want a christmas card, a wedding invitation, a ‘hey how ya doing’ card, I’m sick of you and don’t ever want to see you again.
KNOW IT ALL BITCH: Wha?
INTERESTING LOOKING GIRL (ME): Buh bye.
She must have thought I was kidding since she friended me on FB.
It is 26 years later and I can tell she is still a know-it-all bitch.
I bet her husband hates her.That’s it! I’ve had it.
I’m going to write on her wall,
“I’m Thankful that I’m old and don’t have to put up with you anymore.”
Then I am unfriending her mean ass.