Spring Break 2013 is interesting anyway.
Nothing boring here. A friend of mine decided last week that she and her family (2 boys and husband) wanted to go with us (where ever we went) and even Friday night we did not have a set destination because it got more complicated as more people came in and added opinions. Finally we determined we were going to St. Louis and leaving Saturday. Saturday came and I didn’t hear from her, finally called and she had been sick all night. She had that violent stomach thing that has gone around. ICK. I’m thinking, ok, well I will take off with my kids it will be less complicated.
I get a text from her husband a few minutes later that he and one of the boys still wants to go. So, yes, I headed off to St. Louis with 4 kids and my friend’s husband. Al isn’t super happy about it but since he is in Florida staying in a beautiful place on the beach with his kids for SB then we can all sing a chorus of Life’s a Bitch.
It’s fine, It’s fine.
No, it’s weird.
It’s not weird at all.
Really.
We’ve traveled together before. As 2 families. People keep asking us how many kids we have and how long we’ve been married. We’ve exhausted most topics and touched on slightly inappropriate ones while the kids were swimming. I’ve recommended he take her away for a week (a weekend is not long enough) to reconnect and have some couple time. I’ve learned that his bosses boss is an openly gay man (awesome that he can be openly gay upper management in an accounting office) but the other VPs won’t go to lunch with him. Bummer.
I don’t know what the hell we are going to talk about today.
I sent Al a text yesterday that said
My new bf is fetching us drinks
and got back
I’m not as amused as one might think
I’m seeing him on 3/17 for a few days. That will be urgent after this week. I wonder what our hesitation is that we don’t do these trips all together. Both of us spend a great deal of time worrying about what other people (kids, parents, family, family friends) will think and it occurs to me that with the burden of the distance that is an extra nail in our coffin. For instance, it occurs to me that I am on a trip with a man and his kids instead of my man and his kids.
Just Sayin.
I’m feeling like putting a limit on stupid.
Isn’t that why I got divorced?
Al is really wonderful and worth some stupid but I’m not interested in this level of stupid again. I’m sure he agrees. I will propose to him that we have to make some changes and think of us before some of these other people who probably don’t care anyway.
Okay. Off to meet the other man in my life.
I don’t think you’re crazy for taking the trip. He’s your friend, not just your friend’s husband, right? And the kids were looking forward to one another’s company too, right? And your friend was all for it, not wanting any of you to miss out, right? And Al trusts you, right? And you’re unlikely to fling yourself at your friend’s husband, and he’s unlikely to hit on you, right?
When you go on vacation with Al and his children, it will be different than this vacation. It will about family dynamics and feeling each other out for compatibilities and incompatibilities, for figuring out how the kids will react to adult sleepovers, to how couple-hood fits with parenthood.
This vacation was about you and the kids and your old friends. I don’t think that’s weird at all, even if the friend is male.
But maybe what I should really be seeing is that you and Al and all the kids are ready to meet, to consider such trips together for the first time? That is exciting and scary. And for that trip, I think you should leave the friend’s husband behind. 🙂