You Can’t Find Him On Social Media: Should You Date Him?

• Will you be the victim of catfishing?
• Advantages of dating a man who uses social media
• What are they trying to evade?

 

I read an interesting article on Divorced Moms, Is Social Media Good for Single Moms and Their Mental Health?

The article discussed the disadvantages of single moms using social media, in the case of this article, specifically Facebook.

The point of that post: Social media can be bad for your mental health. Specifically, seeing married people’s “perfect lives” on social media can cause loneliness.

With that, I agree. However, have you ever thought not using social media could cause greater harm?

Greater harm? What can be worse than loneliness?

This article points out the harm that can come from not using social media as well as the harm that can come from dating a man who doesn’t use social media.

Should You Date Him?

Let’s dive in.

Social Media Use vs Deception

Have you heard of the expression “catfish?” If you’ve been single long enough, you’ve heard the term.

It means you’re the victim of a con. The formal definition is “lure (someone) into a relationship by means of a fictional online persona.”

Unless you use social media, how can you check the background of a person you’re dating?

You can’t, but you should.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not recommending you stalk anyone.  However, there are many advantages to using social media to check on a person you’ve just started dating.

First, you can make sure they are who they present themselves to be.

Case in point: Do you watch the TV show 90 Day Fiancé? The show is based on real couples involved in romances.

I am a big fan of Instagram, but there are many cons of Instagram use. One of the disadvantages was revealed on the show.

A man who called himself “Williams” pretended to be from the United Kingdom and sent a woman a stock photo which he claimed to be a photo of himself. He was actually from Nigeria and attempted to extort money from her.

After having been single for years, she announced to her children she was in love with this man and would be moving to the UK to be with him.

Using reverse image technology, they proved to her he was a fraud.

It sounds like Instagram use resulted in a bad experience for her. However, if she did not use Instagram, her children wouldn’t have access to the stock photo to use to prove to her he was a fraud. He sent her the photo on Instagram.

More advantages to using social media to avoid being deceived:

I am again drawing on the TV show 90 Day Fiancé which depicts real-life dating.

A woman found evidence on Facebook that her new boyfriend might have a child he never revealed and was able to confront him about it.  Ultimately, the child wasn’t his but she never could have received the information in order to question him without discovering the information on Facebook.

Also, a woman explored a man’s social media to see images of past relationships to see what kind of women he liked. How did the women in his past dress? How did they wear their hair?

Social media gives you an arsenal of information about your new romantic interests you wouldn’t have otherwise.

Social Media Use vs Unpaid Bills

Employers

Suppose you end up marrying your new love interest. Do you want the bills to get paid? Of course, you do.

Often, a person’s work employment depends on whether they have a social media account.

Four billion people are on Facebook and Instagram combined. Suppose your new boyfriend isn’t on either of these sites and isn’t on LinkedIn or Twitter, professional networking sites, either.

With most of the planet using social media, if your new boyfriend doesn’t have an account, would you wonder why?

Would employers wonder why?

Might it look like the person was evasive or was trying to hide what could be a shady past?

Yes. It could. Therefore, not having a social media footprint could cost your date his job.

Writers and models

As a writer, I know many authors. They tell me their publishers won’t publish their writing without an Instagram account.

Unreasonable? Not at all. Instagram is where sponsors look to determine audience interest.

The same goes for models: I’ve met moms of child models on Instagram. They ask me to “like” their children’s photos. They believe agencies’ support of their children lies in this social proof.

Suppose you date a writer, model, or actor without a social media presence. Could their livelihood be threatened if they don’t have a social media presence?

Yes. it could.

Wrapping Up: The Importance of Dating a Man with a Social Media Presence

What has this article shared? There are dangers of dating a man without a social media presence.

Of course, I agree with the author of the article that there are disadvantages to using social media such as experiencing loneliness.

However, when you compare that to the dangers of not using social media that this article shared, I would rather be lonely until I meet Mr. Right than be deceived or marry Mr. Right and not be able to pay our bills.