So you’ve met a guy and you’re really into him, but how do you know if he is really into you or, just wanting you for sex. Men and women often want different things from their relationships, sometimes we can be emotionally involved with someone and it’s possible they might not feel as the same for you. Many of us have felt this at some point in a relationship and we often continue the relationship because we don’t want to face the fear and the reality that he’s just using you for sex.
Here are 8 signs to help you decide if your new man is worth your time and energy or is just calling you for the late night booty call.
1. Late night booty calls.
Now alarm bells should be ringing if he only calls and wants to come over late at night or when he has been out drinking with his friends and this is a clear sign he isn’t wanting anything more than just sex. Don’t stick it out as you will only end up getting hurt, he isn’t going to change and you are kidding yourself if you think you are the one who can change him. A man who has feelings for you and genuinely cares for you doesn’t just want a late night drunken booty call, he will want to do things during the day with you too.
2. You never leave the house.
When you are in a relationship your man should want to show you off to the outside world, if you are never leaving the house, you should be asking yourself some serious questions. We all love those lazy days of watching movies in bed or just getting lost with each other between the sheets but a real relationship means spending time away from the bed together too, going out for dinner, going to the movies or something as simple as a going for a drink together or a walk. A healthy relationship isn’t lived behind four walls.
3. He ALWAYS talks about sex, sex and more sex.
Does the content of your conversations and texts revolve around sex? Does he always send you dick pics or constantly asking for you to send naked and provocative pictures? ( Jeez guys, STOP sending these, it’s not a turn on if we don’t ask for them! ) This is a huge sign for you to kick him to the kerb, he’s only interested in your body and nothing more, period!
4. Talk the talk but can’t walk the walk.
Now we all know actions speak louder than words and this is a prime example of a guy talking the talk to get you between the sheets and then not following through on all of those adorable, romantic sweet nothings he tells you. If he doesn’t prove his affection with his actions and not just by helping you reach the big O none of his words are true and it’s time for you to move along to someone who is man enough to walk the walk too. He only tells you these things to get what he wants.
5. He always cancels your plans.
Are you the one who always makes the plans? And then when you are getting ready to spend time with him, your phone pings and you are disappointed again that he has cancelled yet another date. You are worth someone who will stick to their words and take you on dates, show up on time and even send little messages telling you he is looking forward to seeing you. Men that always cancel on you don’t need your excuses, this is a cowardly way of showing he isn’t man enough to tell you he isn’t interested in you. Show him you know your worth and tell him goodbye.
6. You still haven’t met his family or friends?
A guy who wants more than just sex with you will want to show you off to his family and friends, there are no excuses acceptable here and the same goes for him meeting your family and friends. If he thinks more about you than just sex he wouldn’t have any objections he should feel honoured.
7. He isn’t comfortable opening up.
Is he standoffish? Does he avoid talking about personal information? You feel you are being open about yourself but not getting the same in return. Relationships are about getting to know each other to see if you are compatible and if he isn’t willing to open up and share this information about himself, he’s either hiding something or he doesn’t have long-term intentions and doesn’t want to put the effort in. He will move on when something he thinks is better comes along.
8. He is constantly on his phone.
If you have just met someone you are genuinely interested in you will want to engage with that person, learn about them, enjoy the time you two spend together, if they are easily distracted by the outside world in the form of his phone and he isn’t investing the time to get to know you ask yourself is he really worth your time.
When you are attracted to someone and what you think is a new relationship blossoming it’s so easy to ignore these signs and / or make excuses for his behaviour, but in all honesty he is playing you like a fiddle and just using you for his own sexual benefit and doesn’t have the intentions of having a relationship with you. You deserve someone who genuinely cares about you and makes you feel special. Yes, the sex with this guy might be great but once you are done with that the feelings afterwards aren’t worth it. If you are having the gut feelings he only wants you for sex and you want more, don’t ignore them, kick him to the kerb. It’s his loss.
Dwight Cole says
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Wow. What divorced mom needs to be told this obvious stuff? A 16yo? I’m a divorced dad who would like to get re-married to a divorced mom. Yes, that’s right. I’m completely willing to take on the whole package, kids included. I’d like to have more kids. But what I’m finding is divorced mothers can’t understand why the kids will always come first. Even though her kids come first to her (as they should) I am not afforded the same consideration. I will be cancelling plans if necessary, I’m not always interested in sex, and you’d better not call me late at night for a booty call or any other reason. I’m perfectly content to stay single if all I find are women who only understand “take, take, take”.