In September, Mr. Geraldo Rivera was a guest on “outnumbered”. Surrounded by four beautiful, successful, career women he shared his thoughts on marriage. What women bring to the marriage vs. what men bring to the marriage. The topic of discussion was Beta Marriages, a theory where people commit to two years in a beta marriage and then decide if they want to stay married or divorce. There just isn’t a good way to put this so here we go….
“I think what a woman brings to a marriage more than anything else– to a relationship– is her youth. Her youth is a fragile and diminishing resource so if a woman were to invest two years in one of these marriages, and then to be rejected by the man, I think she has given up a valuable asset.”
Thank you Geraldo Rivera for bringing clarity to such a cloudy subject…your wisdom astounds me. According to Rivera (definitely qualified to speak on the marriage since he has 4 divorces under his belt), we women bring a fragile, diminishing attribute to marriage, our youth. While men contribute financially, we simply contribute our youth. Obviously the statics on divorce include some very tolerant men. If ALL we bring to a marriage is our youth, then how on earth can these men stand to continue marriage to a woman as she ages?
I am confused Mr. Rivera. I thought we women, contributed financially and with our motherly inclinations of love, kindness, goodness, wisdom, sincerity, strength, stamina, patience and you know, sugar spice and everything nice to the marriage. Not only to marriage but to each and every relationship we engage in.
I believe your four failed marriages might perhaps be a testimony to the error in your thought process. I want a man to bring youth to my bed dang it… but honestly that is about the only place youth would fit in the equation. Oh wait, strike that. I don’t really want a man to be youthful in bed because that would mean he is inexperienced and experience is a wonderful thing.
In my marriage I brought so many things. Since the last 10 years or so of our marriage I was the only employed person in the marriage. I was the breadwinner for a family of five, I was also the housekeeper, the nanny, the laundry maid, the cook (he didn’t even grill), the taxi cab driver just to name a few. When my then husband was severely injured I supported him emotionally, financially, physically and spiritually.
I literally carried him from the bed to the wheelchair, held him up over the toilet while he screamed in pain because he was too proud to use a bedpan. That was wisdom, endurance, love, sympathy, empathy, strength and honestly super-woman powers that come from somewhere deep within. Those are characteristics that far deeper than beauty.
When our son was diagnosed with cancer not once but five times, I was his caregiver twenty four hours a day, seven days a week, every day of the year. I made all the trips to doctor after doctor, sat with him through hours and hours of chemo and too many surgeries to list.
I made the medical decisions because his father said it was too difficult and too painful to choose. I had to set my emotions aside and make decisions that scarred, disabled and deformed our child yet saved his life. Again, no youth in those years of hell. No youth at all. I disagree with you Mr. Rivera. Sixteen years of marriage and I can think of not one single situation where my youth was a contributing factor. Not one.
I pity you, Mr. Rivera. Your senility is showing. Your views are antiquated, archaic and wrong.