On my way to a hopefully peaceful Sunday winding down the week, planning the next, and watching all the shows that the networks and cable companies have seen fit to put on at the same time, I ended Saturday with a family dinner. I am not a big TV watcher, but interestingly enough, between Cable, PBS and Broadcast, there are currently 6 shows on Sunday evenings that I find interesting. Thank goodness for the DVR! Planning my Escape to TV World…
Life is chaotic. I finally put my house on the market. I am still looking for a new job, and my back pain is really bad. Lots of house cleaning and sorting have not helped as I bend and lift. A family dinner is just what I need… Easy tacos and quesadillas, nothing special; there is something for everyone on the table. Eat meat, don’t eat meat… black beans will suffice. I just want a peaceful meal and to laugh with my family. Then it happens.
GF shows up with camel toe and a hickey. As a card carrying member of the all too silent underground movement “Leggings are not pants”, I am appalled. Thinking forward to my peaceful Sunday, I vow to not look down, and just get through the night, hoping my daughter does not notice, and think that this is an appropriate style. When did that happen? The thong riding above the pants faded as a style to be replaced by THIS?? I attempt to straighten her shirt to cover the unsightly view, to find that there just is not enough slack. OK, sweetie, sit down… I will put dinner on the table. Thinking, if I can keep her in the chair, she will be less in view. Thinking back to my daughter, and her collective group of BFFs collaborating at Halloween to be Super-Heroes, I wonder about the idea of idolatry today. I decide to give this a good think as I continue this piece that was simply supposed to start with the next paragraph. What characters are out there representing some female heroic characteristics?
Here starts the original blog beginning:
I have not spent a lot of time dating recently…In fact, I have given up my subscription to Match.com. While I have written quite a bit about my dating experiences since my two divorces, at this point, I have come to the following decision. Until I fix certain things in my life, I will be unable to even determine if someone is a match for me. With my search for love suspended, I have become a binge watcher… Netflix, Amazon Prime and cable tv apps that I can watch while cooking or doing anything else.
My justification for this new habit is research… yeah, research. I am a social anthropologist… I am a people watcher… What sells? What inspires? What motivates? ( Insert updated thoughts about the idea of thongs and camel toes becoming style)
Through the summer, I took notes on my own watching trends. The shows that inspire me to keep tuning in are those that have strong female heroines. I learn from them; I vicariously live through their nerve and I spend time thinking about their situations and I search for parallels in my own life circumstances. These women inspire thought, and in my humble opinion, deserve some attention.
The Affair: I want to root for love. I really do.In this show, I cannot get outside of my own parallels. I am not selecting Allison. I do not like her, and do not support her consistent chasing of a married man. Rooting for her means rooting for Noah. While I can empathize with her sadness, anxiety and loss of a child, I don’t find her child like innocence likable. My choice of heroine here is Helen Solloway, the wronged wife of cheating spouse and potential murderer Noah. The writers of the show successfully created a character of substance. Noah showed his “maleness” as he flirted with a young swimmer at the pool, but there was no doubt that he was happily returning to his wife, home asleep in bed. Helen does it all – attractive, educated, caring mom, talented business owner with a strong back bone. She stands up to her wealthy parents when necessary, and stood by Noah financially, in spite of the affair. Personally, I want Helen to have a happy ending. Sadly, as much as I dislike Noah, his midlife love affair sparks thoughts of hope and possibility.
The Good Wife: Season after season, I have watched Alicia Florrick, lawyer and wife of the Governor, stand by her man for various reasons… what was best for his career, what was best for the kids, and finally what appeared best for her own career as a successful attorney and politician. Meeting all the needs that exist in her world, she never collapses in public. She is a thinker and a planner. She cares about others, and no matter how “down” she is, she finds a new plan with her given set of circumstances. She is the character on tv that I most relate to. If you have not met her yet, you should.
Downton Abbey: Sadness exists as I write about my very favorite show as the upcoming season in January will be its last. There are so many fascinating female characters here, but Lady Cora wins. Since season one, as she put aside her moral values to protect her daughter Lady Mary from her own fate, I have loved her. She knows when to challenge and when to remain silent. She stands by her husband, but is never subservient to his Title of Lord, or husband. Why, do I still relate to Lady Edith, the “villain”?
Scandal: Week after week, this show gets it right in terms of making my heart race. I try not to think too hard in terms of female heroes. Our powerful heroine Olivia has simultaneous affairs, and did her part in breaking up a marriage. When I watch this show because I really want to empathize with Mellie, but I just don’t like her. This week, they got it right, and Mellie pulled on my heart strings. As the Affair became public, she stood in the same room with her husband, as they played with their son. Anger and real feelings aside, if just for that moment, Mellie was my hero as she put her son ahead of her anger.
What have I learned from my summer of binge watching? I want to see strong characters whom I can identify with, but it is thrilling to see the other side of life… I like Olivia Pope and others like her. She will probably never be a mom, and maybe she has slept around a bit, and broken up a marriage, but in the world of TV, thats OK. Escapism is healthy and recommended. Somehow, I still root for her and Fitz. In the world of the Netflix Profile, it is OK, to like someone we might hate in real life. Glass of red wine – check, bowl of popcorn, check…. Take me away Netflix. You are the Calgon of the 21st Century.
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